Understanding what domestic abuse is

Everyone has arguments, and everyone disagrees with their partners, family members and others close to them from time to time. And we all do things we regret and which causes unhappiness to those we care about. But if this begins to form a consistent pattern, then it is an indication of domestic violence and abuse. 

Common signs of an abusive partner

  • Telling you that you never do anything right
  • Preventing or discouraging you from spending time with friends, family members, or peers.
  • Insulting, demeaning, or shaming you, especially in front of other people
  • Keeping you from seeing your friends or family
  • Preventing you from making your own decisions, including about working or attending school.
  • Constantly checking up on you or following you
  • Intimidating you through threatening looks or actions
  • Unjustly accuse you of flirting or of having affairs with others
  • Constantly belittling or humiliating you, or regularly criticising or insulting you
  • Insulting your parenting or threatening to harm or take away your children or pets.
  • Destroying your possessions deliberately
  • Being physically hurt or threatened
  • Threatening or hurting your children 
  • Controlling finances in the household without discussion, including taking your money or refusing to provide money for necessary expenses.
  • Forcing you to do something that you really did not want to do
  • Preventing you from taking necessary medication, or seeking medical help when you felt you needed it
  • Showing extreme jealousy of your friends or time spent away from them.
  • Controlling you by telling you that you could be deported because of your immigration status
  • Showing extreme jealousy of your friends or time spent away from them.
  • Pressuring you to have sex or perform sexual acts you’re not comfortable with.
  • Preventing you from leaving the house
  • Pressuring you to use drugs or alcohol
  • Intimidating you with weapons like guns, knives, bats, or mace.

If you have experienced one or more of the above, this indicates that you may be experiencing domestic abuse.